Official There Is Not One Child Who Wants To Die For Your 2nd T Shirt Sweater

Brenda, bless her heart, had won the church raffle. The prize? A weekend at “Rustic Retreats,” a glamping experience promising “unplugged serenity.” Brenda, however, was the queen of plugged-in chaos. Upon arrival, while attempting to assemble her “easy-setup” yurt, she tripped over a rogue tree root, launching herself and the entire yurt frame into the adjacent berry patch.

Emerging covered in purple goo, Brenda wailed, “My back! I think I broke my back!” Her husband, Dale, frantically rummaged through their SUV for his phone, only to pull out… the prize he’d won at the last church bake sale: a slightly-too-small “Official There Is Not One Child Who Wants To Die For Your 2nd T Shirt Sweater.”

“Dale! Not now! Call 911!” Brenda shrieked, looking like a bruised blueberry.

Dale, ever the optimist, replied, “But Brenda, maybe if you wear it, the paramedics will think you’re making a statement! It’s very topical!” He then proceeded to try and squeeze the sweater over her berry-stained head, further exacerbating the situation and ensuring Brenda’s “unplugged serenity” was now an “unplanned emergency.”

INTERNATIONAL SHIPPING

We Ship Worldwide
Ships from United States

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PROCESSING TIME

The standard processing time is 1-2 business days. We usually process and ship out the orders the same or next business day. It may take additional days if orders have to go through customs.

SHIPPING TIME

United States:

USPS First-Class Mail (2-6 days) Domestic
USPS Priority Mail (1-4 days) Domestic

International Shipping

Standard shipping: 14 – 21 business days delivery (usually carried by DHL)

EXPRESS DELIVERY

We have express delivery method, however to ensure accurate delivery time we only support customers who contact us before ordering. And if you have any questions please let us know by emailing us at [email protected]